I don’t think business schools reach about emotional intelligence and yet, I believe that this is a key element on our entrepreneurial journey both with regards to our efficiency and our wellbeing. In this week’s podcast episode, I talk about how to become more emotionally aware and how to deal with emotions in a responsible way. If we suppress our emotions, they just sit inside our bodies until we reach a moment where our “bucket” is full and this can lead to us overreacting or flying off the handle.
I like the emotional scale offered by Abraham Hicks. I am going to share here the negative emotions scale they offer, but it is not all of their work. Emotions are organised in a ladder so if you move from the bottom up only by one step, you are already progressing very well. It is not possible for example to go from anger to joy in one jump. Pessimism is at the top of the ladder, then you have frustration, overwhelm, disappointment, doubt, worry, blame, discouragement, anger, revenge, rage, jealousy, guilt and at the bottom of the ladder you have fear and depression. Recognise where you stand on the ladder with no judgment. What is crucial is progress and you can only progress when you acknowledge where you are.
There are three things you can do to manage your emotions healthily. The very first thing is to become emotionally aware. Ask yourself often “How does this make me feel?” This is not going to turn you into an emotional mess. If anything, it will empower you and enable you to manage your emotions better. Just because you ignore your emotions does not mean they magically disappear. Buried emotions never die, as the book title clearly indicates.
If you have a host of repressed emotions, you are likely to be triggered by events and to overreact. In truth, no one can make you angry, or sad or upset. You are feelings these emotions because you have beliefs that make you feel this way or unresolved past emotions. So let’s get to work. If you have had traumas, I suggest you seek the help of a qualified therapist. This blog is meant for entrepreneurs who are dealing with within the range of normal emotions. You have three options to support you in this emotional intelligence journey.
Option 1 is to start journalling. I have done a full episode on journalling on my podcast. Click here to read the show notes.
Option 2 is to use Emotional Freedom Technique also known as tapping. You don’t need to be trained in EFT to use it. There are plenty of videos on You Tube to get started. I recommend Brad Yates, but if you are experiencing above average emotions or you have a feeling that they might run deep and bring up trauma, then I encourage you to work with a practitioner. I have interviewed one on my podcast. Make sure it is someone you feel safe with and who has supervision.
Option 3 is to work with a coach that will hold a safe space for you to explore these emotions. If you would like to work with me, click here to book a one hour session. The investment is £189.
Have a great day,
(c) Ange de Lumiere 2019